One Year. 365 days (okay.. I'm 10 days late or so getting this posted, you get the point).
Feb. 17th 2014 was the first day that I got up, got on the mat, and took control of my life.
I believe without that day, I may not be here today.
At the beginning of 2014 I was 400 pounds. I was negative, miserable, sad, and extremely broken.
I thought life had dealt me a shit hand. I was convinced that the world had done me wrong. I wasn't supposed to be 400 pounds, or stuck in mediocrity in my life. I was so lost I didn't even realize just how amazing my lot in life was.
I never really thought any of this was possible. I never imagined I could get back in shape, that I could get healthy. I honestly didn't think I could mend the relationships I had strained because of my negativity, and my anger. Most important of those being my marriage.
I was lost. By the grace of God, and the love and encouragement of some amazing people, I am found.
I have been trying to find a way to explain to you all how I feel for the last week. It's been tough, I have gone thru every emotion imaginable. This journey is about so much more than the numbers. It's about a wife who finally has the husband she deserves. It's about children having a father that they adore. It's about hearing my dad tell me he is proud of me. It's about being proud of myself. It's about having a second chance to live the life I always knew I should have.
There has been very little that has been easy over the last 12-13 months. I have battled demons I never thought I could beat. Food addiction is a very serious, and very horrible thing. You have to eat. Every day you are faced with making the decision to eat well. I still deal with it daily. I will always fight that battle. It has certainly become easier, but I still fail sometimes.
My internal fight with anger and negativity has been equally hard. Early on last year, I talked openly about how I didn't know who I was anymore. I wasn't myself. I was Big Matt. WAS. I'm not anymore. I never will be again.
Along with the 140lbs and almost 100 inches, the pain and anger went away too. It was replaced with hope and positivity. It was replaced with a belief that I could be better, that I could get back to being me. That I was worth being happy.
The greatest gift I have ever received, was so many of you telling me that YOU believed in me, even when I didn't believe in myself. I never thought I would be successful on this journey, certainly not to the extent that I have been.
I'm unable to fully explain in words, the changes my life has seen in the last year. I'd like to list a few of the highlight to me.
I have lost 140lbs, and almost 100 inches from my body. Unless you have been there, you can't imagine the feeling and sense of freedom that provides.
I have a life of love, and a life with hope again.
I have been promoted TWICE at work in the last year. This is a direct result of the changes I have made. It's amazing how much being positive, and happy can change your life.
I'm able to play with my babies again. My relationship with each of them has improved significantly, and thankfully early enough that they won't ever remember Big Matt.
I would like to take a moment to thank a few people who were incredibly important to my success this past year.
Amy,
My amazing wife, I have said so many times that this never would have been possible without your love and support. You cheered me on every step of the way. Even when you didn't always want to eat well, or you didn't want to do another workout, you still did. You have been my biggest fan. I also want to thank you for standing by my side when I wasn't the husband you deserved. For refusing to give up on me, when EVERYONE thought you should. You were put here to save me, and I will forever be thankful for your love and support.
DDP,
I initially looked in to DDP Yoga because I was a fan of you as a wrestler. I had no idea then, that you are an even more amazing human being , than you were a wrestler. The very first time I messaged you, you let me know you believed in me. You constantly encouraged me along this journey. You taught me the power of being positive, and that I can face anything. You saved my life, and since I know you will deflect that, let's say you showed me the way to save my own life. Thank you for everything you have done, and continue to do with DDP Yoga. You are a blessing to this earth, and we are all better because you are here.
My family.
I'm so thankful for each and every one of you. For a seriously long time, I don't think I said that enough. You all have no idea how much it meant to me to hear your kind words. It was so encouraging to see you all excited for me. It was awesome seeing one of you after a week or two, and you immediately asking me how it was going, and telling me how great I look. You all supported Amy and I tremendously this last year. From making sure we have a healthy option at family meals, to always encouraging us with your words. Thank you all.
To my DDP Yoga family.
Thank you all for your continued support and encouragement. A special thanks goes out to Matt Owen and Ross Raymond. You guys have been so amazing. These two guys have taken the time over the last year to check up on me anytime they haven't heard from me in a bit. They have helped keep me accountable, and get me over hurdles and humps along the way. You guys have no idea how important you have been on this journey. Your friendship means so much. Thank you.
To the FUTURE!
Amy and I decided that we were going to take a break for the holidays. I figured 140 in less than 11 months was a pretty good start on this journey. It was much needed. We didn't completely go back to our old habits, but we certainly enjoyed time with family and good food.
When the new year came, Amy jumped right back on and started kicking ass. I was struggling to do so. I couldn't figure out why I was having such a hard time getting going again. I had done really well over the course of our "break". I gained 4-5 pounds back, but I really was happy that I could maintain now that I was down where I initially wanted to be.
That is when I realized I didn't have a goal anymore. I had hit my ultimate end goal already. I was comfortable. I hadn't seen the 250's since my early high school years. I'm truly happy.
I also knew I couldn't just stop, I couldn't just give in to that urge to relax. With that being said, I have made some new goals. I have decided that the 250's will not be the end of this journey. I started back in on the 1st of Feb. and am happy to report that things are going extremely well.
I hope that you will all share this blog. That it will reach to the farthest parts of this earth. So that maybe it will reach another person who needs to hear this message. I have been blessed to be an inspiration to ridiculous amount of people. Every time someone asks me about my journey, and I'm able to share my story, I always get a little giddy.
If you are reading this and you are needing to change your life, please know that I BELIEVE IN YOU. It doesn't matter what your demon is, or what battles you have to face, you can do it.
If your battle happens to be weight, I beg you to go to www.ddpyoga.com. Go check out what it has done for so many people, it just may be the key to your journey as well.
My heart is overflowing with love for you all. Thank you for being a part of my life changing journey. Year one is only the beginning. On to bigger and better things from here.
Until next time.
Matt
